Sherman Letters

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CSHR 9/23

Fort Moultrie S. C.
March 12 1843
[1843/03/12]

Dear Ellen:
[EES]

I have at last got rid of a visitor locked my door and am not at home to anybody whatever till I shall have expressed to you my joy at once more, even at the eleventh hour, seeing your ever welcome sheet and hearing the kind expressions that mark it. You cannot have an idea of the vast pleasure you have in your power to confer upon one so far from home who is exceedingly anxious about all the persons by whom you are surrounded and moved by their interests and feelings that govern you - else you could not allow so long an interval to follow your letters. Yet, but what was I going to say? Not knowing, I'll try and satisfy your questions before I get my sheet full of unintelligible characters. What have I and what am I about? Hard to tell, but as you infer not a little of my time is spent in Charleston, but since I last wrote I have been acting as a kind of lawyer before a Court Martial at Fort Johnston in North Carolina, where I met many strange officers beside the Company to which I belonged in Florida and from which I was promoted to my present position. I was absent about two days which were spent most agreeably in the family of Col. Childs near Miss Kate C whom I will for the present refer you to Phil. I got back in the midst of the Races which in Charleston is a time of great sociability and gaiety - enough of the latter to surfeit the mind of anybody. But as these parties have some pretensions in the world excuse my awkward attempt at a description and for facility let us take a party of easy careless Subs seated at the mess table at Fort Moultrie, grumbling at the slow promotion and abusing the Caterer for a bad dinner. In enters the mailman just from the city, handing to each his documents - one little package neatly done up in a satin bag, beautified by all sorts of Cupids, Sylphs and doves, attracts the attention of all until its contents are spread out and reads out - Mrs. King presents her compliments to the officers at the Fort & would be happy &c &c. Off one flies to the Colonel to get permission for the Barge to take all to the City who wish to attend. The rest scatter to pack up Swords and Epaulettes, &c. &c. In due time we get to the city - deposit our affairs at Lee's and scatter till bout 10 o'clock at night, when having dressed we repair to the Mansion where groups of servants of every shape and size are ready to take the cloaks and caps, throw open the doors and ask us in. Here the 2nd floor generally containing the Parlor & suite of rooms which are all thrown open with the elegant furniture disposed for dancing. To describe all that occurs is impossible. Smirks, snubs, pride, hypocracy & flippancy reign triumphant as in all large strictly worldly assemblies. They dance only the same old set of French quadrilles, devoid of variety and grace - and the waltz so rapid and dashing that one feels a dread for the poor being that lets go her hold and subjects her body to the effects of the centrifugal force -- this too to us who beheld the graceful forms and motions of the beautiful Spanish girls of St. Augustine is really painful - Most of the Officers waltz, but I do not. The music is very fine, being the Theatre Orchestra for which they have to pay from 40 to 70 Dollars per night. The dancing, flirting, promenading, &c &c is kept up till about 2 o'clock when supper is announced. This is served usually in the Gentlemen's Library or other spacious apartment, upon the ornament of which no expense or taste is spared, exhibiting by the brilliant display of light and castellated crystal candles a most sumptuous appearance. Everything from turkies, partridges, down to the veriest trifles, crowd the table - cakes, fruits, candies, all of which are sorely punished ere the evening closes. Following this attack the Gentleman waits upon the poor being he has happened to take charge of, having about as much as he can do till she evinces a desire to return to the Parlor where she is left and all the Gentlemen adjourn to the Supper room. Here excuse me for drawing the curtain as I might expose secrets that our sex is as tenacious of as yours. The Supper is generally the finale, but sometimes, especially at Public balls, a few keep it up till new day dawns - Parties of this kind, after one's curiosity is satisfied, soon tire the body and satiate the mind with their sameness - and want of sincerity & feeling. Such has been its effect on me & I am not singular. Why then do we put ourselves to so much trouble and so great expense to attend them, you may ask - You know that although reason & good sense seem to govern the world yet vanity is a strong motive power. These people have shown us much great attention inviting us upon all occasions to public and private assemblies, for no other reason, that we know of, than to show their appreciation of our profession - at least that is the most charitable construction to put upon the hospitality - It is to our interest, in fact it is our duty, to foster that feeling towards the Army and knowing that nothing would offend them more than to show a disregard to their invitations, we make it a point always for two or three out of our number to attend and the rest excuse themselves on the score of manifold duties.

In this manner has the whole winter passed and now that Summer is approaching, we'll soon have the island crowded with the good people and we will have to turn in and play the hosts. Having a Band of good music, serenades & dances must take place every night - I'd like to have a little peace or rest. I'm tired of playing a hypocritical part, for I feel no more interest in the people by whom we are surrounded than any other strangers - In fact I've been thinking of transferring into a Company stationed at the mouth of Cape Fear River in North Carolina where I could have my horse and dog on Terra Firma instead of a low sandy Island - The society of Major Child's Family and others who reside there & adjacent plantations would satisfy me - As to Mary - I see her frequently & no later than the night before last a the Opera - She is quite well - I do not intend to bring her home with me next Summer - I thank the Lord I'm not so far gone as to commit so foolish an act as you hint at. A good old bachelor's career is before me and as yet all augurs well for its continuance - I am coming home some time in the Summer - about August I think - but how long I stay will depend upon matters and things at home - I can command a leave of absence of four or five months but do not propose asking for more than one or two as I know your father would prefer me to stay and attend to my duties to idling my time elsewhere.

Don't wait for a long period of leisure to write to me. Scratch off a half sheet or even less if your time is precious, but don't keep me in suspense so very long. Give my best love to all the family - Bub and Tommy must be so large that they would feel offended at being called by the familiar names by which I know them. Bub must go to West Point & become an officer. Else when I come home I'll kidnap him and bring him South and make him a Southerner which you all seem to dread so much - The other day it snowed the first I've seen for three years but it wouldn't lay on the ground long enough to make snow balls - I would give anything to have an opportunity to convince you that I did not intentionally upset you that time you refer to - Do I remember it? To be sure, as though it had occurred yesterday - We have most delightful weather at this season of the year -- trees all put out and in blossom whilst you are wading in snow.

Wishing you the greatest pleasure & happiness at home, in the midst of such genuine friends, and the pleasant little circle of old playmates, I must bid you a good night.

Your sincere friend

W. T. Sherman
[WTS]

Fort Moultrie S.C.
Feb. 8, 1844
[1844/02/08]

Dearest Ellen
[EES]

I will not attempt to describe my feelings of delight upon receiving your last, and reading therein, not my doom, but the assurance of your love, and a desire that I should examine with an honest heart, and a wish to believe, if possible, the doctrines of your Church. I snatch at the opportunity, and will do so at once -- but does it not seem that the Fates are arraigned against me. Months glide by and the facilities which the presence of friends and the libraries of Charleston afford, are unappreciated but that moment I desire to consult them I am ordered into Georgia and Alabama, where Religion except of the rudest species, is never found. I would not be here at this moment, had I not been detailed as a member of a Court Martial for the trial of Lieut. Churchill whose name you will find on the Register next to mine. The offence for which he is being tried, is rather a breach of courtesy than of Military Law, and cannot bring upon him any other punishment than a slight reprimand. I know of no position more disagreeable than being compelled on oath, to try and punish one, with whom you have been on the most sociable and intimate terms for years. But Ellen I have some other fears to tell you of. For nearly four years I had been exceedingly diligent in not writing to your father, but the other day I did so for the purpose of asking him to let Boyle, under certain contingencies come and spend the Winter and Spring with me. This day I got his answer, which was very kind but wound up with a hope that I was studying for "civil life". Now I thought he had long since relinquished that idea and his opposition to the Army. He knows my perfect dependence, and that were I to resign, I would have to depend upon some one till I could establish myself in the practice of some profession. Do you think I could do so? Certainly not and should health be preserved to me I shall never depend upon anybody, nay not even were he a brother. I would rather earn my living by the labor of my own hands - Beside I have now studied for the Military profession, and hold a place envied by thousands and for which hundreds of the best young men of this country toil every year. It would then be madness itself at this late day to commence something new. (If Susan Sherman has not hid our Bible you will see that this day completes my 24th year). Shall I not therefore write to your father and tell him of my views, see whether he approves of them or not and then ask his permission to seek your hand for life. It would be more honorable on my part, unless I assume, what I dare not do, that you would act in the matter without your father's consent.

For the present I must remain surrounded by these difficulties until you direct me what to do. I might have declined joining Col. Churchill's staff, but it will serve to advance my future and I hope secure for me the good opinion of one of the most influential men in our Army

Pap Boyle has recovered and will I trust live many, many days, happily near his grandchildren whom he so much loves. You don't know how much he and I used to talk of you all how he would laugh at calling up some childish prank of Phil, or Boyle, the seriousness of Tommy or shrewdness of Master Charley - but it was with tears of joy that he reverted to his own Ellen - who was always first by his side in sickness & pain. I truly would write to him could I believe I would interest him, but I must only beg you to tell him that I always ask of him and wish to be remembered - Don't you pity the Irvin family - poor Susan she can always have the proud satisfaction of being a good daughter - Why don't you tell me about Bill? or is Kiter[?]l bad a loco-foco. Don't you ever take a sleigh ride out to Uncle Wiseman but Ellen I fear your health is too delicate for exposure to your rude weather. When ever this crosses my mind I fear I violate one of the Holy Commandments in coveting the wealth so foolishly lavished by those who do not deserve it. Not with a selfish end but that I might share it with you, and bring you to this mild and delightful climate. I would give years of my life could you have been here this evening, heard Mrs. Keyes sing, have a sociable chat with Mrs. Hawkins eat some of her mince pies, drink whiskey punch - play eucre or join in the free and sociable intercourse that characterizes her family - and afterwards at 11 o'clock to stand on the ramparts and see the moon rise slowly from her watery bed and throw a gentle light over the calm sea and quiet been So widely different from the storms and gales of the North with its bitter cold & snow

I haven't much room to tell Charley anything about Indians & bears but will refer you to a Book which I have just read with infinite pleasure that will furnish you with very interesting reading, and Master Charley with some hard stories - "Stephens travels in Central America" You cannot fail to be delighted with it. I have had my slippers made up very neatly and am envied by all the Subs, they are almost too pretty to be worn - more especially as the shoemaker in the city take advantage of the fact that they are prized by charging more for making than for others already made - I haven't forgot the suspenders.

I find a sheet entirely too small to get fairly started let alone say one half I should desire - This is the last time I shall write from Fort Moultrie for some time and must beg you to recollect that I am going to a wild country, where a letter will if possible be doubly appreciated, and you must not fail to write at once, taking a foolscap sheet and telling all about home - That you are and may all continue happy is the sincere prayer of one who loves you dearly

W. T. Sherman
[WTS]

Fort Moultrie S.C.
June 14, 1844
[1844/06/14]

I have just escaped, My Dearest Ellen, from a most agreeable party of Subs, living over their Florida battles and adventures again, to have a few more delightful moments in your company, for so I feel myself when your letter is spread before me and I have a blank sheet to fill. How shall I express my delight at the feeling & tone of your last, so like yourself, that I could almost see you teazing that pert little cousin of mine, who bears the name so dear to me, Julia, and how shall I answer your question (which you have already answered) whether I could not come home again this Summer? You know that nothing could give me greater pleasure, if for no other reason than the one you suggest, that we might have a long talk and not leave to deceitful pen & ink the task of communicating our thoughts upon a subject that engrosses all my affections and cares. Supposing all things remain for the year as at present, would you if I came home in October, for a few days, return to keep me company through the long and dreary winter nights of next winter? and ever after. I want you above all things to spend one year at Fort Moultrie for various reasons, that you might see the Southern people and become familiar with Garrison life. We have here an excellent Garrison, with music and company, everything that so attaches us to Army life, and in the uncertain condition of affairs there is no saying how long this state of things may last and how soon I might be sent to some post possessing less opportunities for you to see the Army. You know that I am endeavoring so to qualify myself that should you not like to encounter the vicissitudes that I am now liable to I may be enabled to begin life anew in a totally different sphere, and one that might lead to absolute poverty, but with health I believe that by care and industry I shall be able to place you in a sphere of life which you could so well fill and ornament. - Thank my kind chums for sparing you any of my wild vagaries, for some half dozen of them interrupted me - some tumbled on my bed, others filled the Rocking and other chairs, and for the past two hours we have taken a cursory view of the world in general, but more especially the character and accomplishments of two of our fair friends who this day started for Baltimore to see their Ma after a two years absence, and sojourn in a garrison filled by a most rascally set of young Bachelors.

I probably am too much addicted to scheming, but for the past few days I have been unable to divest my mind of a picture which may be too fair for reality, yet within the bounds of probability. 'Tis this, for me to be ordered to Fort McHenry either this year or early next, to remain there one year. This seems easy enough and at present I am sanguine of success. Over the Balance I have but little control, viz to elect Henry Clay as President, who will appoint your father to the Cabinet, he in turn will take a part of his family with him to Washington to reside. Now Fort McHenry is not very far from Washington and a Railroad connects the two places, which would enable your most humble servant to see you very often, and hope whispers that I might at the end of that eventful year throw off the selfish and hypocritical garb of old-Bachelorism and share my future life with one whom I have so long loved as a sister, yea more than any that now live. Is the picture either absurd or delusive? So many events have transpired within the few past years that the phantom I have called up seems within the reach of calculation. You have asked me to confide in you all my plans for the future, and most willingly would I do so did any that suggest themselves assume a tangible or describable form. After casting about me & some reflection I have seized upon a Book that young lawyers groan over - Blackstone - and have with avidity swallowed its contents and shall continue to study and read hard all Summer instead of idling my time in securing and forming friends temporary and changing. I do not want many friends and have never met with any that have so complete a hold on my heart as my oldest and best, and therefore shall so guard my intercourse with the world as to become attached to none, save those with whom I may be associated in life for a long period. But as to the Law. Somehow or other I do not feel as though I would make a good Lawyer, although I meet with but little difficulty in mastering the necessary Book knowledge. Yet not being naturally fitted for public speaking and my education being such as to give me almost a contempt for the bombast and stuff that form the chief constituents of Modern oratory, it would not seem that my prospects in that quarter were very brilliant. Yet honesty & industry could not but secure a competence, and associated with you I could not but be guided by those true & essential principles, yet I want you to see something of the Army before it is rejected as I have known ladies to form a most singular attachment to the life which I could only account for by the fact that in the Army one is sure of being thrown in contact with ladies and Gentlemen only. And if Congress will only exercise towards us a liberal and just spirit, which it is probable they will, influenced by Henry Clay, we will be as well off as most young men of equal ages, and not possessed of property. Yet lest such a hope should prove without basis I will try your father's advice and endeavor to be prepared to enter civil life. In my former letter I told you I had heard from your father but did not mention that he said not a word about the Army, leaving that to my own judgment and discretion. Dearest I know you will tell me not to let worldly matters so engross my mind, but to turn my thoughts to a Source whence life and happiness proceed, to that fountain of piety and Grace that alone can give peace of mind. I bow with humility before that throne of power & Beneficence but must rely upon your more pure and holy heart and faith to intercede for the divine protection during the few years that may be allotted to us on this earth. I cannot but think that the same God who made the Universe and afterwards permitted his Son to be massacred to display his interest in the human family, has disposed of affairs as they at present exist, has made us as we are, has given us our relative positions and duties to correspond, and that he will enable us if we exercise properly our judgments, with due charity and sincerity, to attain a fair share of worldly happiness. It would be vain for me now to deal in assertions, as you know me and my history well enough to say whether heretofore I have performed my duties to my mother & family in a manner to give you an assurance of a continuance of such conduct toward those with whom I may be destined to spend the rest of my life.

I feel ashamed of myself for exchanging so selfish a letter as this may seem, for your last, which seemed to flow so naturally from your mind that I could see you bending over your seat in the room that I know so well, but I will trust to you, for you know that midnight will have its influence upon all & more than an hour has passed since the Sentinel called out twelve o'clock & all well.

I expect daily to hear from Boyle or Bub, but should he not write soon I will, and bore him with some good morality & advice which will be as indigestible as sure to be disregarded.

The two Mexican War Ships that engross public thought & speech dropped down from the city today opposite our fort. The two mustachio'd & whiskered Captains, covered with scars, gained in brawls instead of battle, and breasts decorated with the brilliant Cross of the Republic, paid our fort a visit this afternoon, and our cool impudent looking Battery, our clean, soldierly looking men, and well supplied magazine, called for more than one shrug & Spanish ejaculation. Tomorrow the Lieutenants & younger officers pay us a visit & the Mess will tell them some yarns that will astonish. All talk Spanish, but by means of interpreters a conversation may be held. They leave for New York tomorrow afternoon.

Before finishing, let me thank you for your resolution to write often without waiting for slow trotting ponies to bring back an answer each time. You know my fondness for writing and are already assured that yours will never remain long unanswered. So all you have to do is to set the time and I will conform. Although a little alarmed to hear you got so severe a ducking - I was rejoiced to hear you did not suffer more in consequence. I am in most excellent health. Should I continue on writing I should cross & therefore expunge what you will have enough trouble in deciphering, and will therefore close with the request that you will give to all the family the assurance of my continued affection, and retain for yourself that I continue yours always in love & obedience

W. T. Sherman
[WTS]