Lancaster Ohio;
June 15, 1858
[1858/06/15]
My beloved husband;
[WTS]
The California Steamer came in on Saturday and this is Tuesday, so I am anxiously expecting the Columbus mail by which I hope to receive your letter. We are all rejoicing over the prospect of your returning a month sooner than you intended. Whenever Lizzie hears August mentioned she goes off into ecstacies, saying, "Papa is coming home in August". The poor children cannot realize that it will be long even until August. Major Turner told Father and Philemon that they had written for you to leave and he could not imagine anything that would keep you longer than September at the furthest. I trust in God, you will leave as soon as possible and be blest with a safe voyage home. I am sure the climate of San Francisco is having a very bad effect upon your health. You must be aware of it yourself for you observed that your strength was much reduced. I was glad that you were able to enjoy your stay at Downieville notwithstanding the disagreeable nature of the business that detained you there. I hope you will not have forgotten to mention, in the letter I am now expecting, how the suit terminated. I am distressed to find that you allow your mind to be so harrassed by business and the disagreeable circumstances connected with it. After having so well done your part and being conscious of the purest motives only you ought to be calm and content and to bear with fortitude and equanimity whatever happens. I know it is easier to say all these things than to practice them but you have a strong will, so much intellect and such power over yourself in all else that I am surprised to see you yeild in this. A good conscience ought to sustain you.----
Wednesday 16th morning
I was most happy in receiving this morning your two welcome letters by the Steamer of the 20th of May. If you only knew how much happi- I feel when your letters are writen in a cheerful mood you would always ways write to me that way. I am rejoiced to find that you were in better spirits. I cannot regret your trips to the Mountains because you prefer being there to being in San Francisco and your health is so much better there. If Spear's friends in Downieville wish to spare him the punishment of his crime they had better pay the money for him. They cannot expect you to pay the price of his liberty when they are his friends. I have done nothing to oppose the sale of your property in St. Louis and its vicinity. I had a letter yesterday from Sherman which I will enclose to you. I told him (when I sent the check for paying etc. the other front of my lot there) that you were quite anxious to have your property sold and this is his answer. It need not detain you in California as you could sell it and send on the money when you get here. Do for my sake come home at the earliest possible time. I feel so unhappy about you being there when I know your health is suffering. I am amazed at the news of Mrs. Bowman. She is no doubt a great sufferer although you cannot believe it. My health is much improved and my strength is greater than during the winter and spring. Lizzie has recovered from her deafness and since her last attack of sickness she has been as healthy and active and happy as heart could desire. Ewing will soon win a large share of your heart when you see him -- no washerwoman's child gets more fresh air or has more strength and nerve than he and even his own mother has no stronger will. I flatter myself he will resemble you in intellectual capacity. My great desire is to see him an eloquent Priest some day. Willy is a good boy still and although I do not brag so much about him I can assure you that we will never have reason to be ashamed of him. He has plenty of good sound sense and he has grown much finer looking on account of his increased heighth. I turn them all out together now- indeed I have no choice in the matter. Ewing will run with Willy and Lizzie and scorns to be treated like a baby. He talks well and connects words in the most confident tones. "Where Lizzie gone?" "There my Papa" "I want to go see the cow" and all with the proper accent. He points with interest and affection to your picture yet but I fear he would not know you now were you to step in this moment. He too gets rides on horseback but not quite as often as Willy. When John comes back with him after a ride he stops by the wall for Mary to take the baby off -- often the horse is fractious and capers a good but Ewing sits up nothing daunted and calls out "no no" with a consequential air. He is a fine fellow. I have been engaged all morning packing a box for Sis and Minnie. I sent them by request three cans of preserved strawberries, a jar of pickles, five or six pounds of taffy and a jelly cake besides some articles, of dress and as it all had to be packed with care I gave my personal attention to it. Dear Minnie no doubt thinks the time long before she can see home and friends but it will come at last and she will be very happy. I am housekeeper now Mother being in Philadelphia under the care of Dr. Hodge. Father and Philemon are at Leavenworth. Charley is here and he and I get along nicely and without any trouble. Strawberries have been very abundant at 80 cents a gallon. I am preserving for Mother and me. I will close this letter to send by the Cincinnati mail today and write you again tomorrow morning. Cousin Louisa was in to see me yesterday and both she and I had fitted on us and purchased a new style of shoulder braces which I find a most delightful support so much so that I now write without the least fatigue. I have no doubt but the use of it will greatly benefit my health as I find I breathe more freely and fully with them on. I hear that Rose Reese returned home yesterday -- to be married in the fall. I suppose she will be married at John's -- but I do not know. Indeed the engagement is not spoken of publicly. I am sorry I cannot love those that are so near to you but I am nearer to you than any one on earth and after this we must give up all for each other. I will never again consent to a long seperation from you and I trust in God I may ever make you happy. Hoping to see you soon I am As ever your truly affectionate,
Ellen
[EES]
will write in the morning and send direct to New York.
Lancaster O.
June 30, 1858
[1858/06/30]
My beloved husband;
[WTS]
As I am suffering from quite a severe headache today I will write you but a short letter and will write again tomorrow sending that letter to "Meigs Jr. and Smith." The California mail is made up quite early in Cin. and as I like to give you as late dates as possible I write the two letters for each Steamer. The Moses Taylor arrived day before yesterday and I begin to feel nervously anxious already about my letters. I made Luke wait for the Columbus mail last night although I was morally certain your letter could not get here so soon. I begin to look forward with great impatience to your return -- six long months yesterday since you left us. I fervently pray that God may grant you a safe return to those who love you so fondly and where happiness depends so much upon your presence. You could not believe without hearing them how much and how earnestly the dear children talk of you. September is a charmed month with them and their ears catch the sound whenever it is mentioned -- in September Papa is coming they say. Willy says he thinks that September is the prettiest and the best month of any because then Papa is coming. Master Willy has as much dignified pride as ever -- he is a peculiar child in his disposition and manners. Ewing undertakes to whip him even now but Willy repels any attempt at violence very much as a man would. My nurse that I got the first day of July last year I parted with yesterday. She had grown quite tired of the confinement and would not keep within bounds any longer. I have an excellent girl coming on Friday. Father has been gone since the 1st day of this month and he writes that he will not be home until the 3rd of July. Philemon has been with him and will return with him. Mother has been gone nearly a month also but she will not get home for more than a month to come. She will doubtless go from Philadelphia to Washington to attend Boyle's wedding the last of next month or the first of August. Minnie wrote me that she was "going on to Uncle Boyle's weddeing". Mother writes that she must certainly go on and I suppose she must. I will have to go down to attend Minnie's school exhibition in two weeks from this day. I dread the trip for the weather is exceedingly bot. I have promised to take the children and spend two weeks, but I cannot do so on account of the weather. I wish the poor child was at home for I fear she feels the heat more there than she would here and it is too warm for such a little thing to study or be confined. We have the prospect of a very good select school in Lancaster next winter so Minnie need not go away again. She expects to return to us a young lady but I think she will soon find the child is strong in her heart yet. She is a sweet child and I thank God for his gift to us. Willy has been excited for many evenings in the pursuit and capture of innumerable fire flies -- they are really beautiful -- he calls them lightenin bugs. The extreme heat prevents Willy's horse back rides lately. His great ambition now is to run in his bare feet -- a feat which he this morning accomplished after much persuasion. The town is full of pretty girls now -- so many young girls have returned from their different schools. There never were so many pretty girls in Lancaster as there are at present, but unfortunately there never were so few beaux. I heard this morning that Jesse Hart and his wife have been or are about being divorced. I am sorry and surprised especially on account of the children. I think it is to be regretted. However it is their own affair and I have nothing to say in the matter. Hoping to receive your letter this evening and to have the great happiness of embracing your dear person soon, I remain as ever
Ellen
[EES]
(I will write tomorrow when I hope to feel better)
Lancaster Ohio;
July 1st, 1858
[1858/07/01]
[WTS]
I wrote you a short letter yesterday my beloved husband but as I was suffering from headache I reserved to myself the privelege of writing again today. Your dear letters came last night and could you know the happiness they afforded me you would more frequently forget pecuniary troubles to think of the pleasures of home. I can scarcely contain my joy at the near prospect of your return to us. But with it comes the fear that something may happen to you on the way -- the dread that some accident may at one blast forever destroy our happiness. I dare not allow myself to listen to these suggestions. I banish them as quickly as possible and relying soley on the mercies of God who has given us so many blessings I feel that you will be restored to us and that our future will be one of quiet peace and joy. As for me, I feel that I never have loved and admired you as much as I do now -- that I believe is natural where love has the solid foundation of esteem that mine has had. Your kind letters to the dear children were a source of gratification to me as I am sure they must be to them. I read Lizzie's to her last night, when her eyes glistened with affection, whilst my own were dim with tears of tender regret that so wide a distance seperates us. Lizzie's feelings were wrought up, by your expressions of love and remembrance so that she was quite nervous and when I came to the message about Harry Bowie she burst into tears and said he was not her sweet heart -- that she had no sweet heart. I told it was not you but Harry that had said so and that we would never let Harry have her. She is exactly like me -- I used to feel distressed beyond measure at the bare suggestion of any body's being my sweet heart. I will send Minnie's letter to her today. She will be very proud of its coming so far. I will put three one-cent stamps on it to make it look more important than it would with only one stamp. I told Lizzie not to let Willy know that she had received a letter and the little soul keeps it quite secret although she thinks of it all the time. I came up to Willy as soon as I read one of your letters last night and before he got to sleep and told him that you had sent him word you were coming home and you would take him riding on the pony and that you would take him out squirrel hunting. He wanted to know, if you would take Uncle Charley's pistol to which I replied 'of course' when he drew a long breath of satisfaction and composed himself to sleep a happy boy -- he continued at night the dream of the day, I have no doubt. I told Master Ewing, at the breakfast table that you were coming after awhile with a big stik -- at which he raised his hands and gave an incredulous laugh which aroused the mirth of all at the table. He says I want to go dine -- when he hears the bell-after climbing into his own chair he calls "Uncle Charley! sit down, Uncle, sit down." He does not eat like a child but will have just what we have -- bread meat, potatoes, apple-butter, fruit and tea and coffee -- he seldom eats between meals -no oftener than the other children, but although he is so forward and so large I intend to keep him in petticoats for more than a year yet -- and under petticoat government as long as possible. Poor Tom McCahill! has gone to his last account. I hope his soul may find rest but it seems strange to me that he did not think more of eternity whilst his disease was coming on. I received a long letter from Mrs. Bowman. Please tell her I will write soon. Give my love to all my friends you know who they are -- who I like and who likes me. Charley sends his love and says he is anxious for you to return as soon as possible. Do leave the fifth of August if possible -- I will count the days till you come. You need not be surprised to meet me somewhere between here and New York. Go to Meigs Jr. and Smith's office for a letter when you arrive in New York. God grant you health and a safe passage and to us both a happy meeting is the prayer of your truly affectionate,
Ellen
[EES]
Lancaster
Aug. 31st 1858
[1858/08/31]
[WTS]
I enclose to you, dearest Cump, a letter from Mr. Blanding which I took the liberty of reading. I also forward two of my letters which seem entitled to respect on account of the two voyages they have made. I do not now remember what is in them. I miss you sadly and am determined that nothing shall seperate us for the winter. I am not happy away from you and we must live together no matter how plainly we live. Mrs. Hunter's party last night was delightful. Mr. and Mrs. Hunter expressed great regret that you could not be there. Many enquiries were made for you and many regrets that you were absent. Some of your friends seemed to miss both you and the punch. Elizabeth Reese called this afternoon when I received her very cordially and the visit passed off pleasantly. Mother and Ellen saw her also. She enquired for all the ladies but the rest were sleeping. I have thought of you every moment since you left and having prayed for your safe journey. I trust you are now in St. Louis. I will write tomorrow.
Your truly attached,
Ellen
[EES]
Lancaster Ohio;
Sep. 1st, 1858
[1858/09/01]
My beloved husband;
[WTS]
I forwarded to you, by today's mail, three letters from California two of them being returned letters of my own. I trust you have reached St. Louis in safety and that you are feeling quite well both in health and spirits. I feel so lonely, since you left that I am sure I could not content myself all winter away from you so I am determined not to try it. I called on Father Lange today when he expressed himself charmed with you. I took Ewing to bed with me the first night you left when he seemed quite transported with pleasure at my embraces. Last night he was sleeping so sweetly when I retired that I thought it would be selfish to disturb him. So I was solitary enough -- even with the dear children sleeping about my rooms seem desolate without you. I shall immediately begin my preperations for winter so I shall be ready to go to you at a moment's warning. Having no young babe and being relieved from all immediate prospects of another I could go without a girl if necessary provided I were going where I could procure help on my arrival. I forgot to give you the note that you were to take with you. Write to me immediately what I shall do with it. I am sorry I forgot to give it to you. I did not realize that you were going so soon until it was too late to pay the attention to your packing that I meant to bestow upon it. You left a pair of boots in the closet -- did you intend to leave them? I received a San Francisco paper containing a notice of Mrs. Seymour's death. I think Mr. Seymour sent me the paper. Mrs. Turner knew Mrs. Seymour by reputation. Father Daman received her into the church in St. Louis. I intend writing to Mrs. Bowman tomorrow. By Friday, I hope to hear from you. I beg you to write to me often and do not write despairingly. I told you yesterday that Elizabeth had called on all the ladies of the house asking particularly for me and that I received her with great cordiality. Today Henrietta, Sis and Mary were out visiting and called there seeing May and her Mother. Miss Gallagher has gone home and Mary has gone to Mansfield. I received a letter yesterday from Jude McComb. Lib is better. Mrs. Daugherty and Elizabeth have already exchanged visits since you left and the next event in future is the wedding of Rose--- which is about six weeks distant. Mr. Young is desperately smitten with Clara Martin. Tom and Boyle have been busy since you left. Father is improving. The children are well -- the girls constant to school.
As ever, your devoted wife,
Ellen
[EES]
Lancaster Ohio.
Sep. 7, 1858
[1858/09/07]
My dearest Cump;
[WTS]
I was delighted yesterday to receive your letter of the 3rd inst. which came enclosed in a letter to Philemon. I am truly sorry to hear that Mrs. Turner is weak and dejected and think, with you, that it must be the effects of the climate. I must write and remind her of a promise I made to stand for her next baby. She is to stand for my next but she will probably not seen be called upon. I hope you will stay at Mr. Patterson's and enjoy your visit in every way especially during the fair. Tome will not leave before next week. Ellen is quite unwell and he seems unwilling to leave her here as should she not go soon to Leavenworth she could not get there before spring. Willy Ewing too has been indisposed. Boyle may be in St. Louis by Saturday or before that time but I do not think he will, as I have no faith in Saunders' coming. I hope you will not feel impatient but hope always for the best. Do not forget to write me about my note for $575. I am sorry you forgot to take it with you. If you find when you get to Leavenworth that your circumstances will not justify you in renting a house and supporting us all there immediately, then take boarding for yourself, Willy, Lizzie and me at the new Hotel, or boarding house and I will leave Minnie and Ewing at home. My six hundred and some odd dollars will be considerable towards our support for the winter if I go without the baby and nurse. I could take all the children but the baby and still go without a nurse but I feel that as long as we are not able to keep house we need not take Minnie away from here. Father is determined that I shall leave both Minnie and Ewing and says he will take them out in the spring. Effie says she will take the entire care of the baby and I could trust her implicitly so I would have no wages to pay here and we would be put to no expense in Leavenworth except for board and washing. With only Lizzie and Willy two small rooms would be sufficient for us, if we found it [illegible] necessary to confine ourselves to that. As to my staying here and you there I have fully made up my mind not to submit to any such fate if I can possibly help it. I will rather leave all the children and stay at Tom's but that is not to be thought of, if we can pay our own board. One thing I have determined upon to be with you at all hazards. I was so unhappy last winter that I cannot consent to spend this winter away from you. Charley says he will not consent to my taking the baby away. Father and Mother say they cannot stand it without some of the children and they prefer him and Minnie. Sis has her heart set upon my leaving him and Effie is so anxious to have him stay that she asked Father to make me leave him. I suppose she never before spoke to Father except in answer to a question. If you take a house, however and I take all the family I could get along with one girl for the winter as Ewing is so old and I am not in the family way. You see from all I have written that thoughts have been busy with the future and not, as is usually the case with me, with the past. So do not enter too deeply into any flirtation with sweet Widow Malone or I shall suddenly interfere -- I think she has got too old to be kissing any one but her husband. How do you like the Mason girls? Boyle was quite captivated by one of them last summer in Montreal. I stopped my letter here to ride with Father. We took Lizzie and Ewing and had Kate in the buggy so you may believe we did "go long two forty"---Willy was all in the country today with William and Luke, after plumbs. He has Johnny Mumaugh with him a great deal since you left and he makes long visits at Philemon's which he now enjoys more than ever he did. Their yard is very fine. I enclose a letter which just came up from the Post Office. Our family is quite small again with Boyle and Henrietta, Sis, Charley, and Mary Young all gone. Every one expressed great regret when you left us and even Mary Young would say "how much we miss Captain Sherman". I was very unhappy for a few days but now I have fully entered into my preperations for the winter & believing that I will see you soon I am more reconciled to your absence. I shall write soon to Mrs. Turner. Write often & believe me ever yours, Ellen in my preperations for the winter and believing that I will see you soon I am more reconciled to your absence. I shall write soon to Mrs. Turner. Write often and believe me ever yours,
Ellen
[EES]
Lancaster Ohio;
Sep. 9, 1858
[1858/09/09]
My dearest Cump;
[WTS]
I received yesterday, or late last night, your letter of the 5th and it made me feel happy to find that you were enjoying yourself so much. I would feel happier still if I thought it was your pleasure to go to Church on Sundays instead of going into the Country. Mr. Patterson is very polite to entertain you and I am glad you are satisfied to be there rather than at the hotel. Do be quiet and wait in St. Louis for Tom. I think it will not be long now before he goes out. Boyle and Henrietta returned today from Cincinnati with Sis and Charley. Mary Young and her brother went on east through Columbus. Boyle left home with the intention of going on out to Kansas should Sanders keep his appointment. Sanders telegraphed yesterday morning that he was detained by official business, but he would write. Father immediately telegraphed Boyle to return from Cincinnati. They will not determine what to do, until they receive Sanders's letter. Tom says they may have to go on to New York. Tom's wife is determined to return to Leavenworth this winter, and it will not be safe for her to travel long after this time so I think Tom will do all he can to get off soon. Tom made a Republican speech on Saturday evening to a crowded audience. Father went down and stood at the door awhile; he came home much pleased. Boyle pronounced it an excellent speech. Father says Tom's style is much better than Mr. Stanbery's was at his age and he urges upon Tom to devote himself to his profession. Mr. and Mrs. Stanbery have been here for a few days. I called with Father to see them when they expressed their regret at having missed you. I spent last evening at Mrs. Daugherty's playing whist. Elizabeth had called there on her way down to sit up with Mary Heron who is very ill. I have not yet heard from Lib McComb. I intend writing to Jude tomorrow.
Father's head has got well and the marks are rapidly disappering -- he seems very bright and happy. I have been much interested in a sick poor family -- the Mother is recovering, the baby is put out with a neighbour and one of the children is still very ill. I was delighted to have my interest awakened in them as it relieved me from some depression of spirits from which I was suffering. I wrote you day before yesterday of my ideas of the future. Except in the matter of my spending the winter here without you, your will shall be law and you must decide what I shall do with the children. Any refusal to leave them must come from you.
I shall write again tomorrow or next day.
As ever your truly affectionate,
Ellen
[EES]
Lancaster Ohio;
Sep 12, 1858
[1858/09/12]
My dearest Cump;
[WTS]
I received yesterday afternoon your note with the deed you sent for me to sign. I went immediately to the clerk's office and signed it and left it there to have him write the acknowledgement. I met Philemon as I came away and he went in and gave him the proper form of acknowledgement. I have it now on my stand and will sent it by tomorrow's mail to Mr. Patterson. He will get it on Tuesday.
You are today, I presume, on your way to Leavenworth. You will be pleased to find Hampton Denman Mayor of the City. The news of his election reached us yesterday. It is impossible to tell when Boyle and Tom will get to Leavenworth. Sanders telegraphed on Wednesday that he could not come but he would write. On Friday Father received a letter from him saying that he was fitting out vessels for this Paraguay expedition and would be able to write by Sunday and let them know what he would then be able to do! So it spins out through the month. It is evident, from your letters that you have made up your mind to settle in St. Louis, whereat I shall be perfectly satisfied. There is no place I should prefer to St. Louis except Leavenworth but I do not wish you to go there against your inclination or judgement. I have not a single objection to St. Louis on the contrary I shall be delighted to go there or anywhere in that vicinity. You speak of my Morgan St. lot as a good homestead. If we live there would you not have to break your resolution of never building again? I wrote you a long letter on Thursday which you probably did not get before you left. I will repeat what I said then that if you do not feel able to send for the whole of us this winter I will leave the children here and join you early in November. My note will be due before that time and as I will want scarcely anything for the winter the $650 dollars will go a great ways towards paying our expenses at a boarding home. I thought I would leave Minnie and Ewing, if necessary, when with Willy and Lizzie, I could get along without a nurse and with two rooms in a boarding home or Hotel. I have made up to one thing and that is to spend the winter with you if I have to leave all the children behind me. That could not be the means of your incurring debt, as my note would bear all my expenses, so you cannot object to that if you wish to see me and do not prefer being without me, unless you can have the children too. Minnie and Lizzie have had their hair cut short like a boy's behind and only long enough in front to put behind their ears. They are delighted to get rid of the tedious hair platting they had been obliged to endure. Lizzie ran into my room this morning just out of bed and exclaimed "O! Mama, I dreamed that Papa was here". "I thought he came to the door and called to me to come kiss him." Ewing improves every day in talking and Father seems every day to grow fonder of him.
Elizabeth called last evening. She declined our invitation to spend the evening as she wished to hunt up some one who would sit up at Mrs. Parker's in her place. Mrs. G. Shaffer died at Mrs. Parker's yesterday.
I hope you will continue to write to me very often. You will have some fine rides about Fort Leavenworth with Van Vliet. Give my regards to him and Mrs. Van Vliet.
As ever, dearest, Your truly affectionate,
Ellen
[EES]
P. S. I open my letter to say that I will send by the same mail with this my deed for eight acres in the Budd tract which Father has given me. Please have it recorded. There is one thing to be taken into consideration in your choice between Leavenworth and St. Louis. If you go to Leavenworth I get 80 acres more of land which will of itself be sufficient for us for some time. Tom is writing to you today on the subject of your stay there. Wait for his letter. Ellen
Lancaster Ohio
Sep 15, 1858
[1858/09/15]
My dearest husband;
[WTS]
I have been constantly distracted during the day and it is only at this hour -- eight at night -- that I find time to write to you. Yesterday I received your letter of last Saturday and I must confess to some feeling of regret that the distance between us is for the present increased and not diminished. I fear you will view Leavenworth under less favourable circumstances on account of Tom or Boyle's not being there. But I await the decision you are about to make between the two places with very little anxiety now the first disappointment about Leavenworth has passed. I shall be happy to have the most unpretending home either there or in St. Louis and within the last day or so I have come to feel that I do not care which place you choose. I feel confident however that you have already decided in your own mind, in favor of St. Louis. I think I know you well enough to be able to say what you have already made up your mind to although you perhaps do not exactly admit to yourself even that you have already decided. I am curious to know what your plans are for I am sure they are already formed in every particular. But I will wait patiently until you think it a proper time to disclose them. I will quietly go to work and be ready to go out with the children whenever you are ready for us. If you do not get ready for us all this winter I will go out alone.
All the family are at home again and we are having a very pleasant time. We had a most delightful little card party last night -- the pleasantest I have attended for years. Today I had the chests brought down from the garret and looked over the small chest of papers. I found quite a bundle of papers relating to the vigilance Committee affairs, but as yet I have found no letter and no copy of your letter to Gen. Wool. In the bundle there is Gen. Wool's letter to you besides several from the Gov. and other persons to you. There is also a copy of the Gov.'s letter to Gen. Wool. I have not completed my arrangement of the papers in my trunks and chests and may yet come across more.
A letter came to you this evening from Mr. Blanding. I will forward it by tomorrow's mail. No other letters have come. All the gentlemen, ladies and children of the family enjoyed a delightful walk to Baldwin's woods this afternoon where we had shooting at a mark, and Willy had an imaginary bear hunt. My health has been improving for a week past but for a week or so after you left I was quite an invalid. The children are in fine health. Maria and Ch. Garaghty are down stairs and Charley has come up to beg the pleasure of my company, so I must close my letter and go down. I will write in a day or two again. No further developements in the Sander's affairs.
Believe me dearest, ever most affectionately yours,
Ellen
[EES]
Lancaster Ohio;
Sep. 23, 1858
[1858/09/23]
My dearest Cump;
[WTS]
I received today your letter of the 17th inst. and was surprised to learn that you had not received a letter from me, by that time. I wrote to you on the 10th and on the 12th; and on the 12th I also sent the deed for my Budd property to have it recorded. On the same day I directed the deed to Mr. Patterson for the St. Louis or rather the McKenzie property which I had received from you the day before and signed and had acknowledged. I hope by this time you have received both those letters as well as others that I have written since and letters that Father and Tom have both addressed to you at Leavenworth. I have not written to you since the Sunday and yesterday I thought I would not be able to write to you for some time longer. I was so unwell. I grieve to find that my old disease has returned in my head. The inner side of the left nostril has been ulcerated for some time and for some days past a large lump has formed at the end of my nose which was accompanied by so much pain in my head and such great debility that after considerable effort to keep off conviction, I went to bed regularly despairing last night. Since breakfast this morning however, I find my symptoms less alarming as to the sore in my nose. I have used a wash to scatter it which is proving effectual. I am again regularly fitted out with Cod Liver Oil, Burdock and iodine pills each to be taken three times a day. I feel quite desponding however and fear now that I may look for a developement of the disease in either myself or the children any day. I pray they may die before me if I cannot live to see them grow up in the true faith. If I were to die you could do as other men, take a new wife and have other children to love you---but who would be a mother to them? What would Lizzie do without me?
I can tell by the tone of your last letter that you were feeling well and in good spirits. It is the first time too that you have written as if you could be reconciled to living in Leavenworth. You speak of Father's executing the papers for the property in the Cincinnati tract if the condition of your building there be removed. I understood at first that I was not to get that unless we lived in Leavenworth so it is not worth while for me to give Father your message until I know what you mean to do.
I am very happy to find that you are enjoying your visit. Give my best regards to the Van Vliets.
John Sherman is advertised to make a speech here on Saturday but Elizabeth says she has heard nothing from him on the subject. The wedding comes off in October and report says that Mary R. and Mr. Granger are to be married at the same time.
Tom Ewing is expected home from Washington tomorrow. I think they will probably start to Leavenworth some time next week, but I do not know that they will. Tom is very deliberate and never hurries. I shall be glad to go to Leavenworth on account of the climate but for other reasons I would prefer St. Louis. Choose to suit yourself entirely I do not think I can take all the children from Father this winter but I will do what seems to me best unless you choose to issue positive commands which can be produced. All well---the children live out doors except the girls who are confined at school some hours. All send love. My best regards to Hamp and P. Stanbery. As ever,
Ellen
[EES]
Lancaster Ohio;
Sep 27, 1858 Sunday afternoon
[1858/09/27]
My dearest Cump;
[WTS]
On Thursday I had the happiness of receiving your letter, of the Saturday before, inclosing letters for Father and Tom. I feel happy to find you with some congenial occupation to fill up the time that will have to pass ere you can see Boyle and Tom and determine upon future plans. I flatter myself that you will enjoy your trip to Fort Riley and that your health will be improved by it. According to your arrangements you must have left last Sunday and are now on your way back to Leavenworth. Your other commission with this one, will I hope put you in funds to such as extent that with great economy we can get along snugly until you begin to earn something regularly. I feel that a decision to settle in Leavenworth will be signing a new lease of life to both yourself and me. I am in the gloomiest spirits about my own health, but I feel cheered in heart and mind at the prospect of a home of our own however humble. Although I entertain such great hopes in regard to the healthfulness of Leavenworth yet I am far from unwilling to remain in St. Louis. On several accounts I would prefer a residence there. I do not like the business proposed by Col. Stewart as I think it unsuited to you and you unsuited to it. But the other business, with Patterson would be the very thing of all others. I would feel no misgivings in seeing you attempt that. I suppose you will not decide until Mrs. Hunt's return from Europe either for or against that or Leavenworth. I think we would be very happy and very healthy in Leavenworth. Father seems very much gratified at your apparent preference for Leavenworth and I believe he really begins to look forward to spending his summers there. I shall be ready to start at the word and only wish it may come soon. If you insist upon I will take all the children. I suppose it will be a long time before I shall see home again as I have now too many children to be lugging back and forth and the rest of the family can more easily visit me. I believe I can now content myself anywhere out of California away from home for years at a time. Charley was so much taken with your idea of speculating in mules, horses, wagons, saddles, etc. that Father really talks of sending him out to invest in them. What time does the sale occur? You had better send for us by the very first of November at the latest for the weather may become bleak and cold for travelling after that and remember four children are not easily transported.
Boyle and Tom are expected on Wednesday or Thursday; -- when they will go west I cannot say, but I presume they will start without much delay as Ellen seems anxious to hasten her return.
I believe Mary Monan will be willing to go with me, and should she not, I suppose I can get some one without much trouble. Charley has sent up for me to ride and I will close my letter and go as I feel the want of a ride today. Give my best regards to Capt. and Mrs. Van Vliet -- I am truly glad the Capt. favoured you with such agreeable work.
The children are all very well indeed -- the baby affords amusement for the whole house with his cunning prattle. Believe me ever your truly affectionate wife.
[EES]
Lancaster Ohio;
Oct. 1st, 1858
[1858/10/01]
My dearest Cump;
[WTS]
I see by all your letters from California that you were very ill when you left San Francisco, and on your way down. You did not tell me of this.
I send by this mail two letters which have just been brought up from the post office -- one from Captain Welch and one from Mr. Blanding. The old Captain complains that his wife had not received an answer to her letter to me. I have not written to her and I cannot do so, but, as you know, I wrote to the Captain a long letter in Willy's name before you left Lancaster for Leavenworth. I hope that will satisfy him. There must be a vast array of disappointed idle men in California since the return of the Fraser river crowds. I sincerely pity them.
I wrote a few lines to you yesterday morning by Mr. Walker who expected to go direct to Leavenworth with not more than thirty six hours delay in St. Louis. Tom got home from Washington night before last in company with Mr. Walker. Ellen is not very well today but whether her indisposition will postpone their time of starting beyond next Monday for which it is set, I cannot tell. Tom's movements are always uncertain. I am heartily glad that you have got business enough to last you until they must be there, if they ever intend returning. Boyle and Henrietta were to have left Washington yesterday morning and we consequently expect them this evening; they propose to go on without much delay.
Minnie is distressed at the idea of leaving her Grand Pa and Grand Ma, but Father has made up his mind to let them all go and since your letter he says nothing about their remaining behind, even for the winter. So look out for the whole family and make up your mind to keep us the rest of our lives for we will never again be shaken off even for a season. Willy is happy with the horses and pups. He has lately spent several days at the farm where Charley has been at work, going out in the morning and returning in the evening. Ewing grows strong and saucy -- even you will be obliged to admit, when you see him, that he is smarter than Willy. Lizzie seems to like school very much. When dinner was nearly over yesterday Willy abruptly remarked that "the black one was the littliest and the prettiest" -- he meant of the pups and having been thinking of them all the time he supposed our minds were dwelling on the same interesting subjects. We are enjoying very delightful weather but I feel no longer able to take my long walks. I have not yet written to Mrs. Turner but I will try and do so soon. Father is not very well today -- I fear he is growing more infirm, although he struggles against it. I hope I shall hear from you by tomorrow at furthest as you were to have returned from Fort Riley by last Tuesday.
Ever your most affectionate,
Ellen
[EES]
Lancaster Ohio;
Oct. 4, 1858
[1858/10/04]
My dearest Cump;
[WTS]
I had the great pleasure today of receiving your letter from Fort Riley of the 25th of September. From the tone of your letter I infer that you are well but I would much rather have had that assurance in words. However, if you felt well I cannot blame you for trying to forget that you had been sick. I wish I could say that I am even as well as usual. I have grown so debilitated that I suffer considerable uneasiness about my health. I am not able to walk much and the horses and men have been so much at the farm that I have had very little opportunity of riding. I look forward with eager anticipations to our new home however humble or wherever it may be.
Boyle and Henrietta remained over today for the purpose of celebrating my birthday---the thirty fourth; -- they leave tomorrow but they intend (I think) spending a day or two in St. Louis. Father goes to Cincinnati with them where he remains a few days. Tom and Ellen now expect to leave day after tomorrow. Tom seriously contemplated a winter here as he thought Ellen would not be able to take the trip and he would not leave her. But Doctor Boestler[?] came over today and after due consideration advised her to go out; so unless she should feel worse they will go.
The dear children are enjoying the beautiful weather to their hearts' content. They live out doors with the exception of the hours the two girls are confined at school. Minnie is dreading the seperation from her Grand Parents. I hope I shall hear by tomorrow of your safe return to Leavenworth. Send for us before the weather becomes too bad. Take care of your health.
Ever your truly affectionate,
Ellen
[EES]
Lancaster Ohio;
Oct. 11th, 1858
[1858/10/11]
My dearest Cump;
[WTS]
After several days of anxious expectations your letter was received this evening. It is dated Oct. 1st and mailed Oct. 4th. I had become intensely anxious about you and had (it seemed to me unavoidably) allowed my feelings to get so far the ascendency of my judgement that I was really miserable. I imagined everything even that you were dead, and I verily believe if you had been I should have lost my reason. I never have loved you as I do now, and I freely confess that even religion could not sustain me, were you to die now without me seeing you again and without coming into the Church. Even for my children's sake I could not wish to live---so I thought and felt when the receipt of your letter removed the load that oppressed my heart and made me feel myself again. But at the best I am far from well and am not without the most serious apprehensions of my own ill health -- indeed I am suffering great debility and have occular demonstration that it is from my old disease I am suffering. I can however comfort you with the assurance of the best of health and spirits on the part of the dear children. Uncle Charley took them all out to the farm today to gather walnuts -- even little Ewing went and enjoyed it as much as any of them. Willy is truly devoted to his friend the book binder; whenever he gets anything good he breaks down to the office to share it with him. Minnie has had her ears pierced and wears ear rings. Lizzie had a fine pair presented her by Uncle Charley but she has not had courage and vanity in due proportions to have her ears pierced -- one or the other quality will grow strong enough soon I have no doubt and as her ear rings are real little beauties I wish she could wear them. Father made me a birthday present of a fifty dollar pair of bracelets and Boyle presented me with a half dozen fine table spoons marked "Sherman". It was not Boyle either but Henrietta that made that present. She sent them up by Father, from Cincinnati. I wish you would give her my best love and thanks for her kind remembrance. Do not forget.
I forget to say that after the Cincinnati mail came in at one o'clock today, I telegraphed Hampton to know where you were and I also telegraphed Mr. Lucas asking if he had heard from you lately. About six o'clock I received a reply from Mr. Lucas saying that "they had heard recently that you would soon be in St. Louis. If I had heard, (as I feared I would hear) that you were sick I would have started instantly to go to you. Did you write as soon as you got back to Leavenworth? I hope to hear from you more frequently and to be soon sent for to join you either at St. Louis or Leavenworth. St. Louis has several advantages over Leavenworth in my eyes and one is that you can more easily remove to Leavenworth from St. Louis than you could from Leavenworth to St. Louis.
Excuse my blots and carless writing -- it is late at night and the children are all sleeping around me. Father is in Cincinnati -- went down today -- all the family are well and join me in love to you.
Believe me ever your truly affectionate,
Ellen
[EES]
Lancaster Ohio;
Oct. 13, 1858
[1858/10/13]
My beloved husband;
[WTS]
I need not tell you with what emotions I read your letter of the 6th inst received late last evening. I am not prepared to answer it now, nor do I know that I can say anything on any point that will soften your feelings of bitter disappointment and dismay. You are burdened with a family, it is true, but I am willing to live in the plainest -- indeed humblest manner and serve myself and children -- (so far as my strength will possibly go) provided there be no effort at any display beyond what we have and that you are satisfied. If the home is ever so small, so mean, so out of the way, never fear but I shall make the best of it, if you will only cheer me with your undivided love. I think you know me, Cump, well enough to believe this, if not you will when you have tried me. But one thing I cannot consent to and that is to live seperated from you any longer. I will wear cheap clothes, put them on the children -- eschew society in toto, live far from the Church or near it, as I can, do as much of my own work as possible and be more amiable than you have ever known me, if you will only be cheerful and happy. But if you value my health and peace of mind you must not leave me here this winter. I cannot lead this unnatural life any longer suffering anxiety on your account as I do. If your means will permit no better rent a log cabin or its equivalent with two or three beds, a rag carpet and a stove and if we can have fuel, bread, meat, and coffee and sugar I shall not despair. I am in bad health and I am unhappy and I beg you to take me with you somewhere. You feel more now, as I have always felt about friends and strangers, and if you can concentrate your desires entirely on your family, feeling no desire for the esteem of those beyond, your unsullied conscience and your love of your own will sustain you. I fervently pray that the divine Director of all human events will eventually bring good out of evil, and I am not without the hope that a day is dawning for us more bright and beautiful than any we have ever yet seen. In all your trials dear Cump bear in mind the fact that nothing can ever make me as miserable as your death and that for my sake you must be as cheerful in mind and prudent in the care of yourself as it it possible. Hoping for more cheering news soon -- As ever yours sincerely
Ellen
[EES]
Lancaster Ohio;
Oct. 14, 1858
[1858/10/14]
My dearest Cump;
[WTS]
After writing to you yesterday I received your letter of the 7th inst, written I was happy to find in much better spirits. I am distressed to learn that you are suffering so from chills but I hope they may soon leave you. I think you do wrong to take no better care of yourself but it is not worth while for me to say a word about it so long as I am away from you. By this time your auction sale is over and Boyle and Tom are with you. I hope all suspense will soon be over and we will soon know where we are to live and be together once more. After all that you have written I cannot help thinking it would be much better for you to go to St. Louis at once and do the best you can there with or without the aid of whilom friends and acquaintances. You are much known and every man who ever knew you relies implicity upon your high honor so you cannot fail to get into business and gradually prosper. If Obear adheres to his offer why not take that without a partner -- or Col. Stewart's offer either? We can live more cheaply (if we choose) in St. Louis than we can in Leavenworth and as far as I am concerned pride may go to the winds -- I can kneel with the humblest and dirtiest of my countrymen every Sunday in the aisles of the Church and not consider myself degraded so long as I am upright and honest and a true follower of the God I worship there. I altogether incline to St. Louis now, but I will not oppose your stay in Leavenworth. Only I hope you will not form a partnership with Tom as I know you would be unhappy at his frequent and prolonged absences. He was delayed this time by Sanders, it is true, but he showed no anxiety as you will have perceived by his stopping on the way to make political speeches. I shall gladly get ready at the word of command.
Mr. and Mrs. Anderson are visiting at Mrs. Daugherty's with the children and my time has been devoted to them today. I met Mr. Hite on the fair ground this afternoon. He says he has almost made up his mind to settle in St. Louis and he hopes you will also settle there. He wants to write to you. All send love to you - all [illegible]. Give my love to J Jenrist??. Ever affectionate yours,
Ellen B.E. Sherman
[EES]
Lancaster Ohio;
Oct. 20, 1858
[1858/10/20]
[WTS]
Late last evening, I received your letter of the 12th, my dearest husband, and although I fancied I was all ready to start yet the few last things to be done always before a journey, will keep me several days longer than I would like to be delayed I will make all the haste I can and get off by the latter part of next week, I hope. I dread the packing up but I know Charley will help me through with it. Father, Mother and Minnie are in Cincinnati. Philemon is also there but we look for them all home in a day or two; they went down -- Father on Monday and Mother, Philemon and Minnie yesterday.
Rose Reese was married this morning -- the wedding took place in the Episcopal Church -- the morning was beautiful, the bride looked handsome and every thing passed off delightfully. John and Cecilia, Susan Bartley Jude and May McComb and Mary Sherman came down on Tuesday. Susan is staying at Mrs. Daugherty's. All the family -- that is the married portion were invited there last evening to meet some friends when we had a delightful evening. We all met again by invitation at dinner at Mrs. Daugherty's. This evening we go to Elizabeth's and tomorrow evening Maria Garaghty gives company for them. John seems to be enjoying his visit very much. Tomorrow he and Charley Garaghty are going around to examine the state of all the old school houses etc. about the town.
I will observe all your directions as to the journey -- stopping at the Virginia Hotel etc.---I will if possible leave here next Thursday so as to leave St. Louis on Sunday evening or on Monday. I am distressed to find that you are still suffering from chills but I hope to cure you up when I get there. Your letter to Father came today but I will not send it to him as he is to be home so soon. I will probably write again tomorrow. Give my love to all -- Willy Cox is not well and Ellen I presume is not writing to Tom today: Hoping to see you soon I remain as ever your truly devoted,
Ellen
[EES]